


I Can't Stay

by SkywritesDaydreams



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Other, spoilers?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-13
Updated: 2020-03-13
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:15:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23130805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkywritesDaydreams/pseuds/SkywritesDaydreams
Summary: Yasha is on her own when she has a weird Dream. Set after the Loss of MollyMauk.
Kudos: 8





	I Can't Stay

How long now? Days? Weeks? I had lost track. The pain was too much. To lose another so close to my heart, It was devastating. The friendship we had, The vulnerability I could have with him, I could never get that back. It was lost forever, Just like Zuala. Molly. Zuala. Gone.

I led the storms. I stayed five steps ahead of the Stormlord wandering. Trying to find anything to quell this ache in my chest. I lost track of miles and time so easily like this. Nothing mattered. Just Existence. An empty shell wandering the land in search for something they aren’t sure about.

Finally my body caught up with me. At sunset I had to make camp. A small flat spot under a tree on top of a hill overlooking a dead field. Everything was dry and dead around here. They could use the rain he would bring. In the distance, almost like a rumble in my own mind, I could hear the storm lord slowly making his way towards my camp. I just made sure to lash together some branches in case he came while I slept. I hated waking up to soaking wet hair. I leaned against the tree staring out ahead fiddling with a piece of dead grass between my fingers as my eyes slowly closed.

The birds are what woke me. Sparrows chirping above my head. Warm light touching my skin. I opened my eyes slowly and just stopped. The once dead field was thriving with life. Tall grasses and little rabbits hopped around. Flowers bloomed everywhere, lavender colored with a sunburst in the middle with different types in blues and darker purples. They were everywhere. I got up from my resting spot and walked further out gazing around. I could see the tent, The one the carnival used setting up below near a small creek. What was this? Had it all been a bad dream?

“Mind if I join ya?” I turned quickly reaching for my sword before freezing.

Lavender skin, Red eyes, That insane multicolored coat, that smile. There was no way. He walked closer with his tail flicking out behind him as he stood next to me looking out.

“Big crowd tonight Yasha. It’ll be a show for the books for sure!”

“Yeah. Yeah I guess it will be.” I couldn’t hide my shock. I wanted to touch him but I was so scared. I didn’t want this to be a dream.

“You going to help out tonight? You know I could always use you to make it more fantastic. You are the charm after all.” A subtle wink got a chuckle out of me as he sat down close by. I sank down into the grass near him. He had picked one of the flowers and was rolling the stem between his fingers watching the pattern swirl.

“Too bad you can’t stay huh…?”

“What do you mean?” He smiled then and suddenly the soft grass became dry and coarse. It was all dead again. Then a snap and it was back. I looked around confused and honestly scared. What was going on?

“Molly.. Where the hell are we?”

“The Inbetween. A place for people like me to talk to people like you. Your side can only reach it in their sleep….” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cards before shuffling them and drew the top one. Instead of the tarot being there, It was almost like a memory. Jester curled up by the fire with her sketchbook open showing off what they had done that day. He pulled another and it was Fjord. He was dreaming as well. A fearless captain on a ship using his magic to keep the seas safe. Caleb was after him, Curled up with Frumpkin and a book open on his chest dead asleep. Nott curled up by his side holding her flask like a stuffed animal. I laughed seeing it before he drew the last one. Beau. She was still awake. Playing with a deck of Tarot cards looking confused and worried. It was the very same deck he had there.

“I’ve been keeping an eye on you all… And asked a favor. You’ve been worrying me Yasha.” He flipped another card and it showed me. I was asleep against the tree but Tears were streaming down my face. I felt then and it was real. Even now my face was wet with tears. Molly smiled then.

“You really do miss me don’t you?” I nodded then before moving closer and reaching out. Molly came into my arms and hugged me as I stopped holding it in. I cried for him. I cried for the loss of my only friend. I cried for the loss of my wife all those years ago. All the pain I had been carrying came out and I couldn’t stop it. Molly didn’t move. Only to lay back and hold me closer, Petting my messed up hair, just being there for me like before. Before all of the death and the trouble and the mess. Just back when it used to be us and the Carnival. He had always been there for me.

Time moved slowly. I didn’t know how long I had been there laying on his chest just holding on. I didn’t want to let go. We just watched the clouds and listened to the wind. Slowly tho, Sunset came and with it, Desmond on his violin. Even all the way up here, We could hear him. Molly sighed then as I got up. He laid there for a second longer.

“It’s gonna be a good Night Yasha…”

“I hope so… Um…” He looked over then and smiled.

“I know better.”

“I didn’t even ask.”

“You don’t have to.” He sat up and sighed.

“I can’t come back… As molly or Lucien.” I nodded then looking down. I felt him get my chin then and make me look up.

“Hey…. Don’t look so down, you silly girl. I never said I wasn’t going to still be around. I can't stay with you physically is all.” He smiled then before kissing my forehead. I laughed then as he knelt down and picked one of the flowers. Same colors as him. He slid it behind my ear then.

“Keep it close and I’ll always be there with you Yasha.”

“Promise?”

“Swear. On my pretty little horns.” I gave him that look before we both ended up laughing. I got up then before hugging him close.

“We loved you Molly… Don’t ever forget that.”

“I won’t. Trust me. Take care of yourself.”

“I’ll try.”

“And try to find the others too… Beau loves you Yasha so don’t let that skip by you.” I nodded then smiling.

“I like her too… So I’ll do my best.”

“Atta girl!” He let me go then with a huge smile before a whistle pierces the air. We looked down and a small black figure was down there.

“Molly!! Come on!”

“I’m coming!” He sighed then and relaxed.

“Vax is new with us. He’s damn good in the air. Makes my sword show a lot more fun and daring. Even better when he adds in his daggers.” I just smiled then before letting him go. I watched as he slowly walked down the hill whistling an old tune before I felt myself getting really tired. I closed my eyes falling back into the grass then not able to stop the smile.

I woke up to a roll of thunder above me. I jerked awake and looked around. It was close to noon but the Storm had made its way to me. The first few drops sizzled and dried as they hit this barren field before it started slowly coming down raising a fog of sorts from the hot ground meeting the cold rain. I sighed a bit just listening before I felt something shift. I reached up into my hair and pulled away something surprising. The flower molly left there. I looked up then before smiling and getting on my feet.

“Thank you…” The loudest peel of thunder hit my ears then as I shifted my sword.

“Forgive me… But I’m ready to serve you again… if you’ll let me.” I stepped out into the Rain then and it wasn’t cold. It was warm. Almost like a hand saying it was ok. I found my little book then and found a safe location for the one molly gave me. I slid it back into my armor over my heart then as I headed off to find where he wanted me to go next. After all, I wasn’t as alone anymore.

The next morning, with no one there to see their wonder, The once dead field has new life. Small and green, still breaking through the softened ground, tiny flowers in all shades of purples and blues with sunbursts in the center bloom across the field. A field of Purple Reins grown in memory of a god who shall forever reign.


End file.
